Another batch of my poetry, again written mainly in 2002

Cruel World

Picture a mother waving goodbye to her son
Will she see him again when it is all done

His very last smile she keeps locked in her heart
She won’t think the worst or it will tear her apart

He walked into the distance in clothes all of green
She remembered fondly how his buttons did gleam

She used to sit and worry as any mother would
He pledged to do his duty the best way that he could

At first he wrote her every day from road, air or track
Telling her he missed her and wished he could be back

His letters stopped so suddenly inside she knew just why
Her instincts told her he was dead she couldn’t say goodbye

So her only son had gone, her grief it was so raw
What is the point of fighting what is the point of war


You Don’t Matter

I look at you, I feel nothing
At all
Other than anger
And I build a wall

The more you talk the more I
Feel sad
All I feel is
So very bad

I wish you’d get it and
Just go away
Find someone else and
Ruin their day

You say you love me
But I think you cannot
Or else would you want me
To be something that I’m not

I’m numb from all
This constant grief
To say goodbye
Is a big relief

So scream and shout and
Cry your tears
I’ve always wasted
Too many years

Understand It’s Over


I’ve told you it’s over please just let it be
I’ve never felt for you like you feel for me
I can’t help my feelings you knew at the start
Nothing would change what I felt in my heart

You wanted to gamble thought I was strange
But I am a person why should I change
I’ve tried to be gentle and ease you away
But it’s not working you’re still there every day

What will it take to make it quite plain
I don’t want you around you have nothing to gain
Learn to accept it couples do drift
Nothing can heal this very big rift

You think that I’m stubborn and really want you
It’s not gonna happen believe me it’s true
You make me so angry whenever we speak
You’ll never again make me feel this weak

I’ve put up for too long with your silly ways
I had nothing to dream of I hated my days
Do not obstruct me let me live my life
I’m telling you now, I’ll take no more strife

Don’t tell me you love me it may go in my ear
But it doesn’t affect me I don’t want to hear
Sort it all out pull yourself back together
It’s over period today and forever

Goodbye

Dry your eyes, cry no more tears
We both know we’ve wasted all of these years
I am not what you want, I never will be
So lets end it now between you and me
My mind is made up I am so very sure
We’re not for each other not any more
It’s always been wrong right from the start
I think that its fairer for us just to part
Gather your thoughts then leave me for good
Think it through wisely you know that you should
I cannot help it the way that I feel
But I know that it is all very real
Do not turn back for one last glance
I’ve closed this chapter there’s no last chance

Silent Partner


I cannot see you but I know you are there
Hearing my dreams and all of my prayers
You know what I’m thinking bad or good
I know you would answer if you felt you could

I speak to you lots in different ways
It’s good that you’re with me throughout my days
I’ve only just found you it took a long time
But its never to late to be given the sign

I thank you for everything all that you do
Ask you to help me and forgive me too
I’m sorry for things that I do which are wrong
I repent my sins, so you’re not mad for long

Since I have found you, things have happened to me
I feel so much better, how I’ve longed to be
I’m calmer and happy I feel like I’m new
I owe it to someone and God that is you

Gurgle

You pick me up and put me down
Never notice when I frown
You stroke my hair and kiss my face
I never stay in one place

You talk to me and sing me songs
To me it seems all day long
You give me drinks and rub my back
So many times I lose track

You take me out and push me far
And drive me round in your car
You hug me lots and change my bum
Is it fun to be a mum

My View

You all stare at me, talk at me, cuddle me
You all say strange things
You all love me

You all tickle me, fuss over me, want me
You all go silly
You all love me

You all rock me, feed me, burp me
You all marvel
You all love me

My Family

My family to me seem quite diverse
But I’ve been lucky, it could have been worse

My Nan is the head of this family tree
She’s little and ginger and very lovely

My Mum is called Marge, Keith is my Dad
They are the best, nothing about them is bad

Linda and Reg come up next in the chain
Always ready for a card game

Then ensues Edward who is married to Cleia
We don’t see them enough and this isn’t fair

Kathleen and John take the next place
Always off to climb another cliff face

John number two and Sandra’s his wife
She likes Keith Duffy and footballs John’s life

Simon and Jennifer, two cousins so great
I love being with them and drinking til late

Edward, Elizabeth and Elton come last
Also cousins who learned English fast

So they are my family and I feel very blessed
To have them is great, they’re simply the best

Violated


What gave you the right
To invade my space?
Now people I see
They all have your face.

You chose me I think
Or was it just chance?
I never looked at you
Not even a glance

You were a stranger
I am sure I am right
Yet you took my body
And filled it with fright

You held me down hard
Hands round my throat
You tore at my clothes
As I tried not to choke

You said you would kill me
If I said just one word
I still tried to scream
But nobody heard

I wonder at times
If you know what you’ve done
Do you not care
That you’ve hurt someone

You took from me
Something sacred and pure
I don’t want to go on
There’s no point anymore

You made me feel dirty
I’ve nothing to give
I exist only now
I do not live

Secrets

We meet in secret so no one will know
Where we are or where we do go
Its hard to keep secret something so good
We’d tell all if only we could

Small country pubs in the back of beyond
Or feeding the ducks on a far away pond
Snatched moments aren’t great but its all that we dare
Until one day when our lives we can share

We’d ruin it all if we had to choose
If it came out, we’d be the ones to lose
What we have is sordid but pure
You’re the only person, whom I’ve ever been sure

We found each other too late in our lives
You have a husband and I have a wife
Our babies are young but as soon as they’ve grown
We’ll run off together and be on our own

Until that time we just have to cope
And dream of the time when we can elope
There’s nothing more either can do
But I know you love me and I love you